How to Properly Roast Your Duck

The Trouble with Music

So, I think we can all agree that music is pretty grand, right? It’s relaxing. It makes us happy. It makes us want to dance. It lets us all be and Katy Perry in the privacy of our morning commutes. But sometimes, music sucks.

But Kyle, you’re a music major! How can you think music sucks?

Because I have a functioning memory.

Take this song, for example. “Lovers in a Dangerous Time,” as performed by Barenaked Ladies. I was just getting into this band in the winter of 2010/2011. I was dating a girl, things were wonderful, I was full of hope for the future. Then she and I broke up, and I was much more brokenhearted than I care to admit here. Then I heard this song, and one line popped out to me.

Nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight.

Gotta kick at the darkness till it bleeds daylight.

Woah, man. That’s some powerful stuff right there.

This song became the top track on a playlist specifically designed to help me pull myself out of the rut and get on with living life. This song become my go-to song when I started feeling down, because it always made me feel better.

Fast forward a year. I meet this girl. She’s amazing. Yeah, she lives two and a half hours away, but she’s special. I’ve never felt a connection like this before. By god, I think I’m in love with this girl. She starts going through a bit of a rough time, so I send her this song on Spotify. I figure it helped me, so it could help her. It does.The song now has a special meaning, because it’s something she and I share. It’s special to us.

feelsgoodman.jpg

But then, the bombshell drops. She doesn’t want a relationship. Not only that, but even if she did, she probably wouldn’t want one with me.

Fuck.

Now, the song is mildly tainted for me. It’s still a brilliant song, but I get conflicting memories. It still makes me feel like wrestling the world into submission by its nose hairs, but at the same time it makes me remember how much I cared for her and how I’ll never get to be with her.

Fuck.

Sometimes music sucks because it can mean so much to us. We get all these complex emotions and thoughts going in our heads, and we can’t really express them. Not until we hear that one song that nails it perfectly. From that point on, that one song will forever remind us of whatever we were going through when it came on Pandora and just clicked.

As much confusion as this song may cause me now, it has become a part of my being. I will always consider this one of my favorite songs, despite the memories I’ve associated with it.